“Come on, I know you like him!” my hopelessly romantic friend would tease about some random guy.
“Nope, he’s not my type!”
“Ooof! What type- shype? What’s your type anyway? As if anyone has a ‘type! What are the types of guys anyways?’
Thats when my segmentation-targeting-positioning mind jumped to drawing up ‘types’ of guys. Many enthusiastic diagrams and pie charts later, the realisation slowly crept up on me that my friend’s question was probably rhetoric. Oh well, I was too deep in now.
So on the occassion of valentine’s day here are the types of an Indian guy:
- The PG13 Guy- AKA ‘the good guy’. This is mummy’s favourite type. The boring, conventional, socially-challenged, arranged-marriage type who your parents want you to marry.
- Popular profiles include : Banker, IT- professionals- guys who don’t get to see open spaces often
- Pros: the ‘settled’ guy who will never have an extramarital affair, because-lets face it- who would have an affair with him? Perfect marriage material because of… (not sense of humor, dumbo!)… Money, Money, Money! (nothing is funny on an empty stomach). Bye-bye working your ass off and Hello Louis Vitton!
- Cons : Certified Mama’s boy. Possible side affects of association: Probable death by boredom and lingering smell of hair oil around self
2.The smart corporate guy– A mutation of the above type. The corporate guy who is not socially challenged.
- Profile: Marketing and sales guys, Call centre TLs etc
- Pros: Theorotically, the best of both worlds.The guy who may not bore you to death and your mom may tolerate.
- Cons: Defeats the very purpose of a good guy. Boring and not even the abundance of money to compensate.
3. The Bad Boy– Diametrical opposite of the above. The guy no one marries but everyone wants to take home
- Popular profiles include: Struggling film artists, rock stars, djs etc (they never make it in life-too much responsibility)
- Pros: Excitement guaranteed. Plus a lot of feline jealousy
- Cons: Well he is a bad guy. Strictly for fun only. Attachment is hazardous to self
4. The evolved artist– The passionate artist working for (gasp!) job satisfaction.
- Popular Profiles include: Advertising and Script writing types
- Pros: Evolved self-actualisation perspective of life. Plus learning creative ways of managing without money
- Cons: Are there any creative ways to manage without money?
5. The ‘bijiness’ type– The simple graduate who’s earning millions in some non academic business. Translation- bad guy with money
- Popular profiles- Any moneyed business guy from traders to film producers
- Pros- Excitement with dough. Literally the dream guy.
- Cons: Dont expect to have a conversation. Or to have a faithful husband
So my type is ….drumroll….type 2! You can see I am the type who stands on the fence.
So, girls whats your type?