Ok, ok I’m no professional. In fact, I’m sure there are better people to ask. But for some reason, people do seem to share their problems with me. And I listen. And give my opinion. Is it right? I dont think so. But do they make you feel better? Yes.

So,in the interest of making light of all the seriousness in our lives, here are some problems readers (names changed, of course) shared with me. And here are my answers.

Read it only for the lack of expert advice!

I am 28 and have never been in a serious relationship. I just haven’t found a guy who’s good enough for me. Anyway, everyone around me is getting married , so last week my parents ‘arranged’ a guy for me. He was soooo beneath me. Not as qualified, not a great job profile and not half as good looking! Seriously, he looked like ‘jaadu’ in Koi Mil Gaya-bald and short! I wanted to say ‘no’ on the spot but controlled myself. And then, two days later they called and said sorry! He rejected me! What’s wrong with men?- confused Shobhna

 Sandy : Ok, Shobhna, first thing you need to do is take a good, long look in the mirror. A full length, Saint-Gobain mirror. Is everything in its right place? Then be very very honest (its only you) and ask yourself -Is the girl in the mirror Aishwarya Rai? Vidya Balan? Even Anushka Shankar? Done? Good! Then get out your business card. Write on a piece of paper what exactly is your designation- not the fancy- manager/ vice president/ executive assistant, but what really really is your job? Data collater? Secretary? Secretary who makes presentations?

Now you are ready to get into a relationship. Best of Luck!

 

Ohhhh, how I hate meddling aunties. I have this annoying relative whose only job is to make everyone’s business her own and show ‘concern’ for their erroneous life choices. When I was 25 and unmarried this aunty was after my parents always asking, ‘so when’s the big day?’ and saying ‘aajkal girls zyada padh jaati hai toh no one wants to marry them.’ Now when I have two kids, she is like, ‘Oh you’ve done an MBA and now ghar pe baithi ho! Anyone can bring up kids ’ Urrghhh! Want to scream and strangle her!- Infuriated Ranjeeta

Sandy: You mean you didn’t? Please, on the behalf of every suffering woman since women started getting married and all their parents, please please do so at the earliest. And make sure you get one of your definitely smart kidos to record the altercation. I promise to put it on youtube, blogs etc. Who know we may start a jasmine revolution of our own here!

I am a call center team leader who works odd hours and only gets home in the middle of the night. And yet, my wife always waits up for me. And what’s more at four in the morning, after a long long day, she expects me to talk! Help!- Desperate Amit

Sandy: Dear Amit, I understand your predicament, but your problem is that you suffer from the common male delusion that women want to hear you talk. The truth is that all she really wants you to do is listen to her and make ‘understanding’ comments such as ‘yes!’ ‘you’re right!’ ‘she’s just jealous of you’. You can even record these on an I-pod and play it regularly as you nod sincerely half asleep. I assure you that after half an hour of this, your wife will be satisfied and you will not have to ‘talk’ anymore!

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